Marriage vows should include “I promise to take you on a date at least once a month”. Dating your partner is easy to forget because marriage is looked at as an accomplishment. You got the girl/guy to say, “I do” forever, what more is there to do?
Once you are married dating is no longer about impressing your significant other but more about maintaining your connection. It’s about unwinding into each other apart from the rest of the world. It creates a pause in your everyday life.
Date night can be anytime from once a week to once a month. You and your partner should discuss what works best for your schedules. The idea is to make a commitment to each other and try your hardest to keep it. This may also mean that at times one of you will have to take the lead and make sure date night is a priority.
Try and keep date night for you and your partner only. This is your time as a couple, away from everything and everyone else. If you find that you may have to share this night with friends or family be sure to check in with your partner first before agreeing to anything.
If you don’t know where to start, don’t worry here are some ideas:
If you have been married for a while and date night is a new concept kickstart the idea by taking it back to the original date. Taking your significant other to the place of the first date adds the sentiment and makes you look thoughtful. If the restaurant or place no longer exists, try to recreate the first date as best as possible in your own home. This can be tricky if you try to be perfect but remember the most important part of this idea is to recreate the memorable parts of that night.
If your schedules are different it’s as simples as creating something that fits your schedule. If your partner works late and may be too tired to consider date night then perhaps a breakfast date would be a better idea. Or if your partner comes home a little after dinner but still has time and energy before bed, make it a dessert date. Something as simple as sharing a slice of pie with some wine or talking over a batch of cupcakes can help do the trick.
Sometimes things just don’t work out. You couldn’t find a babysitter or the sitter canceled. You got out of work late so now plans are pushed back. Anything can dampen your mood however the main goal is to keep the routine of date night going. This may be a blessing in disguise so just adjust the date to your settings. Make it a fun family date night. You can try an interactive or themed restaurant. My son especially loved the restaurant Ninja New York. They kept him entertained with a magician and the occasional Ninja who would pop out and try to scare him. While my husband and I could steal a few bonding moments. Check out: http://www.ninjanewyork.com/ for more information.
If you are trying to be cost effective it can be just as fun to find a cheap and delicious recipe online or from your favorite cookbook. Be sure to keep it quick and easy so your family can participate without losing interest. In my experience, most pasta recipes have been the easiest and most delicious to cook. Keeping it local can be helpful. Try and establish a favorite restaurant to frequent as family. Somewhere that is accessible, quick and caters to your family’s taste. This will help build tradition and memories between you, your partner and your children. Going back at least once a year to that spot will make it bittersweet each time. My families favorite local place to eat is Salvatore’s of Soho (http://salvatoresofsoho.com/) in the Riverdale section of the Bronx. It’s a cozy place that is not far from where we live and offers the comfort of our favorite foods: pizza and pasta.
It is very easy to get caught up with your everyday life. We are all trying to accomplish our goals and live our dreams. Being married means you have a partner who can help you achieve these goals and dreams. So, take a little time every now and then to wine and dine.