Dating

Are They Husband/Wife Material?

Is the person you are dating really the "one?"

Are They Husband/Wife Material?

If you think you may have found “the one,” then chances are that you may be thinking about marrying that person.

Perhaps you are the one preparing to ask the age-old question, or perhaps you are the one suspecting to be asked soon. Either way, it all comes down to deciding whether or not that person has what it takes to be a good husband/wife, or has the makings of one. To really understand this, is to really get to know someone else, as well as yourself, on a deeper level. So get prepared to dive deep into what it takes for someone to be worthy of marriage, at least a prosperous one.

1. They practice self-awareness

Being self-aware is knowing everything you need to know about yourself, for example, what you like and dislike. It also allows you to understand where you are going wrong and where you are going right in life. Gaining perspective on yourself allows for intuition to form, which is the stepping stone towards knowing how to love yourself. When you love yourself, you are better able to love others and others are better able to love you back in return.

2. They are consistently trying to reach their highest self

Anyone who strives to better themselves is a good candidate for marriage. Marriage is work, and if it is easy, it isn’t healthy. The reason why marriage takes work is that you have to think of others and not just yourself. So if you strive to be the best version of yourself, the chances of you finding someone else who does the same is higher. Someone who betters themselves knows already that to work hard on something is to see better results, so your marriage may still be hard, but more fulfilling.

3. They think in terms of win/win

Anyone who thinks about win/lose, lose/win, or lose/lose, is immature and would not be a good partner. To be a good partner is to think for the best in just about everything. There are so many choices to make in a marriage, so learning win/win is helpful in navigating the hardships in life. This is not to be compared to a compromise, which would be a lose/win scenario. To think in terms of win/win is to find the middle ground where both people are happiest.

4. They think in terms of interdependency

Anyone who is codependent or dependent in general may not know how to take good care of themselves outside of marriage should things end poorly. You don’t want to worry about this happening and be the reason why you should stay. Someone who thinks in terms of interdependency knows how to be dependent on themselves but also knows that sometimes they need the help of others to reach a goal that they otherwise could not reach by themselves. When two or more interdependent people collaborate, they may reach even higher goals.

5. They are good listeners

A good listener listens carefully to what someone else is saying so that they may be better able to understand them and the situation at hand. Good listeners do not think about what to say next while the other person is talking, because that would divert their attention to themselves, and their attention should be completely on the other person.

6. They give and take feedback well

Feedback, be it positive or negative, may come off as criticism, but those who take and give feedback well are more interested in what they are doing wrong so that they may be able to better themselves and others around them.

7. They love even when they don’t want to

Love is an action, not a feeling. You can like someone, but to love them is to show it. If you or your partner love even on days when you don’t want to, then this may be a good partnership.

8. They are happy with their life and with themselves

Anyone can have a bad day and bounce back to being happy, but if someone is happy with their life and with themselves, then they may be a positive influence on you as well.

9. They are satisfactory in bed

If the sex is bad, change what you are doing to decide if your partner is right for you. You don't want your partner to feel friend zoned if you like them as more than a friend. Anyone can improve with practice, and anyway, life is not all about sex. Eventually, health conditions begin and soon enough you don’t want it as much. So if your relationship is based on sex, you may be disappointed and may need to reevaluate your life.

10. They enjoy your company and vice versa

If this isn’t true, then something needs to change, and fast.

If you have been with your partner for a while and have anniversary date ideas clouding up your mind, then take a moment to think about how your ideas may or may not be reflecting the person you love. This is because anniversary date ideas should be about how much the other person means to you, and not about how much you want them to like you back. As you begin to imagine your ideal marriage, think about if the person is right for you, not if you are right for them. You may never be enough for someone, but someone may think you are enough for them. I wish you the very best in your endeavors!

Image Credit: Pixabay

Tags: Dating

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