culture

Twitter Is Livid Over Male Feminist Aziz Ansari Treating Date Like A Douchey Frat Boy

23-year-old photographer accuses Ansari of inappropriate sexual behavior. Date says it was, "the worst night of my life."

Twitter Is Livid Over Male Feminist Aziz Ansari Treating Date Like A Douchey Frat Boy

Master of None star and vocal supporter of the #MeToo movement has fueled both fem-rage and anti-feminist sentiment after babe.net tweets story of a Brooklyn photographer vividly describing Ansari’s offensive sexual behavior while on a date in 2017.

According to the woman, given the fictitious name Grace, Ansari —self-proclaimed male feminist— pushed for unwanted sexual activity after being given numerous signals his date didn’t want to sleep with him. She told Babe: “I know I was physically giving off cues that I wasn’t interested. I don’t think that was noticed at all, or if it was, it was ignored.”

In her graphic description of the awkward sexual encounter —that occurred post-dinner at Ansari’s nearby Tribeca apartment—, “Grace” recalls the comedian intentionally or unintentionally ignoring her discomfort. Despite her dodging his pubescent sexual advances, he persisted in asking her if she wants to have sex. She told babe.net, “I wasn’t really even thinking of that, I didn’t want to be engaged in that with him. But he kept asking, so I said, ‘Next time.’ And he goes, ‘Oh, you mean the second date?’ and I go, ‘Oh, yeah, sure,’ and he goes, ‘Well if I poured you another glass of wine now, would it count as our second date?’

Grace’s account of the cringe-worthy date describes the oldest dating faux pas that’s been around since high school. —Guy pushes for sex before a girl is ready or comfortable. Guy keeps pushing for sex after it’s been made clear his advances are not reciprocated.— Based on Grace’s follow-up text to Ansari post-date, it seems like this night Aziz Ansari was that guy.

Ansari's fans are shaken to the core by allegations. They’re stunned that beloved, 34-year-old Parks and Recreation star used his celebrity to sexually pressure a 22-year-old into sex. Disenchanted, fans on twitter begin to question: What happened to Aziz Ansari the nice guy that advocates for women's rights or roles in society on Letterman?

And what about the nice guy mansplaining problematic male aggression towards women in his Netflix stand-up comedy special? But according to the accuser’s account of the bad date, Ansari clearly was the nice guy that wanted to get laid that night.

Then again, like most of today’s political discord some people are questioning, why the outrage? Sure he violated his own liberal gospel of anti-misogyny, but he didn’t force the girl into sex.

This may be true, but Ansari is still a Hollywood hotshot speaking on feminist issues the way most celebrities do. Girl Power. #Metoo. Yay, I’m woke. But like many artist, his actions suggest he’s a fake male feminist. —He uses his public image as a way to show he’s a modern male, sympathetic to the woes of his female-counterpart. But his inability to decipher “the craw” is unsexy and offensive, suggests Hollywood’s #TimeUp advocate is actually what some call an off-brand cereal feminist; privately when it comes to sex, he doesn’t respect the feelings of actual women.

In Ansari’s defense, he admits to Cosmopolitan.com, “A lot of this stuff dudes are not aware of, and when they hear about it they're like, ‘Holy sh—.’."

Hm. Some get this point but disagree, and for a few reasons:

In this case, many #MeToo supporters admit this case of celebrity sexual misconduct is a little ill-defined because, despite the accuser’s ambivalence, she consented to perform oral sex twice before leaving his apartment. Despite her reluctance, she engaged in a consensual sexual activity. The woman addressed this paradox by explaining to Babe,“I didn’t leave because I think I was stunned and shocked.” She said, “This was not what I expected. I’d seen some of his shows and read excerpts from his book, and I was not expecting a bad night at all, much less a violating night and a painful one.”

Needless to say, the awkward sexual interaction has sparked an emotionally charged conversation about: sexual misconduct, sexual assault, and celebrities exploiting social media sexual harassment campaigns.

Certainly, regarding efforts someone shouldn't be criticized for standing up for victims of rape and sexual misconduct; anyone doing good work for the movement deserves praise. But someone like Ansari totally fails when he publicly endorses #TimesUp and female empowerment, without coming clean about his own misconduct and sexual impropriety. In a statement, released by his rep through The Hollywood Reporter Ansari says he was, “surprised and concerned” to find out his date felt uncomfortable. And in light of recent events, he has taken, “her words to heart and responded privately after taking the time to process what she had said.” According to his rep, Ansari will, “continue to support the movement that is happening in our culture. It is necessary and long overdue.”

Apology accepted or unaccepted?

For now, he still faces judgment and twitter backlash.

Photo By Jordan Strauss/Invision/Associated Press

Tags: culture

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